February 2012
67 posts
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ghostess:
writing about your feelings and then putting ‘idk’ at the end so you don’t sound like a faggot
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Mom: *calls my name*
Me: *closes computer, gets up, opens door, walks downstairs, jumps through hoop of fire, fights muhammad ali in his prime, wrestles a bear, out runs usain bolt, climbs mount everest*
Mom: Hand me that thing literally 5 feet from where I'm sitting.
Me:
what do you even do at a nightclub
like is there wifi
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mom: you know he's old enough to be your father
me: the father of my children
mom: what
me:
me: what
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“Why is it so fucking cold?”
– Europe (via junsook)
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bawbag:
Has anyone else noticed that the symbol “&” looks like a man dragging his butt across the floor?
me: I'm gonna study when I get home
me: I'll just study before I go to bed
me: I'll just study in the morning
me: I'll just study on the way to school
me: I'll just study in this class
me: I'll just study in the hall
me: I'll just study before the test
me: I'll just study during the test
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A dozen roses: $12
a box of chocolates: $10
a happy valentines day card: $2
still having $24 dollars because you're single: priceless.
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Michael Jackson alive: "Ew that fucking pedophile what a horrible person"
Michael Jackson dead: "LONG LIVE THE KING OF POP HE WILL BE MISSED WE LOVE YOU MJ"
Amy Winehouse alive: "That slutty heroin addict needs to just drop dead already"
Amy Winehouse dead: "Ugh she was such a great talent, taken so young. Rest in peace, Amy ♥"
Whitney Houston alive: "Stupid crackwhore. What a fucking moron."
Whitney Houston dead: "I am in tears, she was taken so soon. Her voice will live on. She was so wonderful and talented."
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clungetastic:
my drug dealer cracks me up
